And so… new year, new cheer bow!

So, this morning, I’m doing the sit-in-my-driveway-drink-my-Starbucks-and-listen-to-the-radio thing while they make me laugh out loud. Then someone makes a snot rocket joke. Now, don’t get me wrong– I love me some 13-year-old-boy potty humor, but I hate snot. So what do I do? I immediatly turn off the car and go inside.

Then, I got to thinking…

All it took was one bad joke to lose a listener.

Wow. They had me literally in tears from laughing so hard, and they had me on the hook until they made one stomach churning remark. Is this how the rest of the world is? Or am I just completely intolerant? Is there something that would have made me more likely to sit through the jokes?

Then I got to thinking about my own stuff. My own writing, and my own marketing job– it’s basically my entire life’s work to keep people from stopping. Is that an impossible task? Am I funny/witty/creative enough to do that?

And what about you? What’s something that makes you stop listening/reading/talking to a person, etc.?

Without further adieu, we’re proud to present the schedule of events for WriteOnCon 2011, which takes place from Tuesday, August 16 – Thursday, August 18.

WriteOnCon Schedule of Events:

*all times EDT, LIVE events will take place here. Content will take place on the main WriteOnCon site.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011:

6:00 AM: Welcome Keynote by author Josh Berk – in a BATHROBE!
7:00 AM: Pacing in Contemporary YA by author Sara Zarr
7:30 AM: Call for questions for literary agent Steven Malk
8:00 AM: How to Write A Killer First Sentence by author Jodi Meadows
8:30 AM: Picture Book Queries by author Emma Walton Hamilton
9:00 AM: Myths and Misconceptions by literary agent Holly Root, and editors Molly O’Neill and Martha Mihalick
10:00 AM: Drawing From Memory by author Alan Silberberg
10:30 AM: Writing For Multiple Ages by author Shelley Moore Thomas
11:00 AM: Literary agents Carlie Webber and Christina Hogrebe’s thread opens in the forum.Participants can post their “Twitter pitch” (pitch in 140 characters or less) and first 100 words for critique/comment. Entries capped at 75.
11:00 AM: Live Forum Q&A and PB query critiques with author Emma Walton Hamilton
***This event takes places in our FORUM. Emma will be answering questions and offering advice on previously submitted PB queries HERE.
***Click here to learn how our live forum events will work.
12:00 PM: On Platform, a live chat with literary agent Sara Megibow
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.
1:00 PM: Creating Compelling Settings by author Jessi Kirby
1:30 PM: Puzzled By Picture Books by author/illustrator Sarah Frances Hardy
2:00 PM: Is your MS ready for submission? by author Tom Leveen
2:30 PM: LGBT Lit by author Scott Tracey
3:00 PM: Live Q&A chat with literary agent Suzie Townsend
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.
4:00 PM: Don’t Give Up! by author Beth Revis
4:30 PM: Writing Magical Realism by author Nova Ren Suma
5:00 PM: COLLECTIVE BLOGGING & BOOK PROMOTION — Ten ways to collaborate with fellow bloggers and writers on-line and in-person (For published and not-yet-published writers!)—Stages on Pages
6:00 PM: Author Collaboration with author Jay Asher

8:00 PM: Live Q&A Forum Event with literary agent Jessica Sinsheimer
***This event takes places in our FORUM. Jessica will be answering questions HERE.
***Click here to learn how our live forum events will work.

9:00 PM: Panel of Professionals (Michelle Andelman, Emily Meehan, Annette Pollert, Jim McCarthy)
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

6:00 AM: The Debut Year by author Lindsey Leavitt
7:00 AM: Illustration 101 by JH Everett and the Studio 5 Illustrators
7:30 AM: Putting Yourself Out There by author Saundra Mitchell
8:00 AM: I DON’T CARE THAT HE’S HOT: Building Believable Romance by editor Martha Mihalick
8:30 AM: The Shakeover Makeover—Shake Your PB Till It Shines! by authors Tiffany Strelitz Haber & Corey Rosen Schwartz
9:00 AM: Novel Beginnings, How to Find the Best Place to Start by author Lisa Schroeder
9:30 AM: How to Write A Synopsis by author Jodi Meadows
10:00 AM: Literary agent Alyssa Eisner Henkin’s thread opens in the forum. Participants can post their 250-word pitch for critique. Entries capped at 50.
10:00 AM: Creating Characters for Picture Books by author Tammi Sauer
10:30 AM: What Makes Middle Grade Sing? by literary agent Joanna Volpe
11:00 AM: Live Twitter Pitch Event with literary agents Carlie Webber and Christina Hogrebe
***This event takes places in our forum. Carlie and Christina will be commenting on the previously submitted pitches HERE.
***Click here to learn how our live forum events will work.
12:00 PM: Are You Ready to Query? by literary agent Kate Testerman
12:30 PM: On Compactness by literary agent Weronika Janczuk
1:00 PM: Live Q&A with author Sarah Rees Brennan
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.
2:00 PM: Character Growth by author Lauren Oliver
2:30 PM: Balancing Writing, Work, and Life by editor Kendra Levin
3:00 PM: Live Query Letter Q&A with literary agent Jenny Bent
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.
4:00 PM: Submission Basics by literary agent Ginger Clark
4:30 PM: How I Know If I Like It by literary agent Sara Crowe
5:00 PM: Literary agent Roseanne Wells’s thread opens in the forum. Participants can post their YA query for critique. Entries capped at 50.
5:00 PM: Live YA Q&A chat with Holly Root and Barbara Poelle
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.
5:30 PM: YA Muses Vlog
6:00 PM: Marketing 101 for Children’s Book Authors by author Emma Walton Hamilton

9:00 PM: Panel of Professionals (Kate Testerman, Martha Mihalick, Joanna Volpe, Jen Rofe, Diana Fox)
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

6:00 AM: Ask A Bookbuyer by bookbuyers Faith Hochhalter and Brandi Stewart
7:00 AM: Chapter Books, Graphic Novels, & Hybrids: Exploring the Potential of the Young Reader Market by author Eric Wright
7:30 AM: How/When I Know A Manuscript Is Right For Me by editor Annette Pollert
8:00 AM: 10 Traits of an Author by author Amy Dominy
8:30 AM: Moments That Matter by author Matt Myklusch
9:00 AM: Writing A Great Query by literary agent Jim McCarthy
9:30 AM: Respect by author Kiersten White
10:00 AM: Live 250-word Pitch Event with literary agent Alyssa Eisner Henkin
***This event takes places in our forum. Alyssa will be critiquing the previously submitted pitchesHERE.
***Click here to learn how our live forum events will work.
11:00 AM: Successful Marketing/Promo/School Visits by author Jon S. Lewis
11:30 AM: Pacing by author Tara Hudson
12:00 PM: Live chat with literary agents Marietta Zacker, Joan Paquette, and Michael Bourret
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.
1:00 PM: Revision by author Carrie Ryan
2:00 PM: An Editor’s Perspective on What Authors Should and Should Not Talk About Online by editor Liesa Abrams
3:00 PM: Traditional vs. Self-Publishing Live Chat with literary agent Sara Megibow
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.
4:00 PM: Dialogue by literary agent Tina Wexler (blog)
5:00 PM: Live YA Query Letter Event with literary agent Roseanne Wells
***This event takes places in our forum. Roseanne will be commenting on previously submitted query letters HERE.
***Click here to learn how our live forum events will work.
5:30 PM: Class of 2K12 Vlog
6:00 PM: Answers to Questions by literary agent Steven Malk
6:30 PM: The Reading Room  TOP 5

9:00 PM: Panel of Professionals (Natalie Fischer, Anica Rissi, Kathleen Ortiz)
TOPIC: Open Q&A
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.

10:30 PM: AB Lit Chat (Jen Rofe, Kelly Sonnack, Jennifer Laughran, Caryn Wiseman)
***This is a live event. Please click here to make sure you know how live events work.