When I think about characters, they start out perfect. My gamer geek is actually a hot as hell bimbo blonde who kicks butt, my teachers are wonderful caring people that want to nurture and such… and of course there’s the guys.

The first drafts of my guys are super model-quins who love unconditionally and overlook all the faults of those leading ladies.

But, um that’s kind of boring.

And, you know… unrealistic.

I’m not saying that your characters can’t fit into stereotypes. Hell, a certain amount of that is expected when you read a story because it helps the reader fill in the blanks. What I am saying is that you have to give them faults in order to make it real. Even Clark Kent wore eyeglasses so we wouldn’t immediately* see him as the perfection that is superman.

So, the question here is–how do we write characters that have these faults but are still believable as the types we want them to be? Sure prescription glasses are something, but I mean other more interesting faults that people can relate to. One that comes to mind is clumsy Bella in Twilight. To me, this really stuck out, so I guess what I am wanting to see is characters that have flaws that blend into the story and make it better. Ugh… that kind of sounds hard just thinking about it.

So, now that I’ve decided the answer isn’t just some really kickin’ eyeglass frames, I have a lot of thinking to do about characters and their flaws. Which means I am going to turn it over you, dear readers…

So, what flaws do you like to see in your books?

*Why can I never spell immediately right the first time? I feel like I should write it 100x on a sheet of notebook paper just to learn it.

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

So, yesterday I asked you guys to embarrass yourself in the comments, and you did not disappoint.

One confession in particular really stuck out for me:

I realized that if I dinged someone’s car in the parking lot , I would not leave a note. If someone dinged my car and left a note, I would not accept any money. I’d be like pfff! You seen my clunker? Repair a scratch? Ha! I think that you should expect a perfect car when it’s new, and after that, dings and dents come with the territory. If I wouldn’t pay for a dent-repair on MY car, I’m not going to offer to pay for yours either.

At first I was all like, “Sheesh, that’s not very nice.”

Then I remembered something– when I was in high school I did this.

A group of friends and I were on our way to Six Flags, and we pulled into the bank parking lot to get some money from the ATM. We were being typical teenagers, and when I pulled out of the space–I backed right into the door of someone’s car. I should have left a note.

I should have called my mom. Isn’t that why she GAVE me a cell phone in the first place?

But I didn’t… I didn’t do any of this. Instead,  I listened to the cute boy sitting in the back seat of my Bronco. When he said, “DRIVE!” I did.Plus, I really wanted to go to Six Flags, because I knew when I got scared on the big roller coasters he would hold my hand…

I drove off.

The entire door of that car was all crushed in, and I just drove off and left it. We’re not talking a little baby ding here–we’re talking those people probably had to go get a new door for their car.

And it was my fault. Just writing this blog post I feel bad about it. I feel like I am going to get caught, too. I feel like the police have been looking for the girl who smashed in that door on that old beat up car for the last 15 years and now they are going to come to my house and take me away.

Now, that’s the kind of emotion I am scared to write about.

Those feelings, the way that made me feel that day to be such an asshole of a person. Now, when I think back–I can kind of rationalize it. You see, teenagers are impulsive and they do things without thinking… this was obviously one of those moments for me.

But let’s be clear here… I knew leaving was wrong, and I did it anyway because I didn’t want to face the consequences. The thing is–I didn’t have to, either.

Well, that’s not entirely true–I’ve spent the last fifteen years knowing I wrecked someone’s car and feeling like a jackass about it.

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

So much so that I made an informative graphic:

Now that I’ve just come out there and admitted it, I feel much better. I hate socks, and I hate shoes more. If I could just wear flip flops year round I would, but it’s been like snowing in Texas so that’s not really an option this winter. Which means, my feet are all cooped up sweating into my shoes and socks, and just straight up stinking. Ugh.

I know what you’re wondering…

Why would I admit this on my blog?

Well, because I think it’s confession time. Sometimes when I am writing I have a lot of trouble letting my characters get embarrassed. I hate to watch people in awkward situations, and I try to protect my characters from it. So, in an effort to help them through the flushed faced life of a teenager, I figured I would just come out and embarrass myself.

So, I’m Jamie Harrington and my feet stink.

Do you want to embarrass yourself today? Leave it in the comments!

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

So, the other day I was talking to my agent and she asked about my current work in progress.

A(gent) o(f ) A(wesomeness): You outline your books, right?

Me: Um, yeah, Sorta.

AoA: Well, do you want to send me what you have?

Me: Uh, I guess I could take a picture of it or something.

AoA: A Picture? You don’t do it on the computer?

Me: (Crap, I have to tell her…) No, I use a giant drawing of a dinosaur.

AoA: I’m sorry,I think we have a faulty connection. It sounded like you said dinosaur.

Me: His name is storysaurus.

AoA: Yeah, do you think you could just put it in a word document?

Me: Sure I’ll get right on that.

You see, when I was in second grade, Ms. George taught us how to write a story. She used the storysaurus. He was a dinosaur with spikes on his back. Each spike represented a chapter, and his whole body represented the story’s main plot. I fell instantly in love with storysaurus, and I still use him to this day.

And, because I love you–and because you probably have no freakin’ idea what I’m talking about… I made you a little drawing:

(If you click the drawing, it should show you a larger version)

So, dear readers of my blog–my guess is that you don’t use a dinosaur to outline our stories. (Although, you may now, because let’s face it, dinosaurs make everything more fun.)

So, tell me.. How do you plot?

Sigh, fine… you can buy storysaurus apparel here.

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

The thing about writers is, until we figure out that we’re actually supposed to spend our lives living in make believe lands and telling pretend stories–we are a little lost. So, we work some pretty interesting jobs. What’s so great about those experiences, though is that they give us a chance to see and learn new things… and that just makes for better stories. So, really we do this for our readers.

Yeah, that’s what I’m going to go with.

I thought maybe today I’d talk a little about some of my old pre-writer professions.

Receptionist at the International Language Building of my College- This was a crazy job, because all the students there were learning English. Yeah, so that means that none of them actually spoke the same language as me. They’d show up, try to explain to me what they wanted with words like dog, cat, and here while I mostly just smiled and nodded. This went both ways. I’d ask them to give me their ID or something and they’d hand me a stick of gum.

Camp Counselor- As far as summer jobs go, this one was the best. I learned to shoot a bow, build a fire, and throw a pot. It was free room and board in the middle of the mountains, and we had a gourmet chef. Of course, I also got a concussion, dysentary and like nine different kinds of poison ivy/oak/whatever. I’m probably going to set my next book there, though–so it wasn’t all that bad.

Phone Sales- Okay, so I can’t really count this one because I only lasted one day. I went in, sat at the little desk they provided me and tried to convince some people to buy coupon books. It was horrible. The boss smelled weird, he yelled a lot that no one was selling the impossible to sell coupons, and the people there made me sad. I went outside for my break and just didn’t go back. That was probably my favorite part.

Video Store Clerk- I got this job because I babysat for the owner of the stores. Well, this just really pissed off the manager, because he didn’t get to hire me himself. He HATED me. I mean seriously, I once caught him in the back of the store telling someone how much he wanted me to just quit. Asshole. I went home sick one day and he called the store owner to tell him he caught me at McDonalds! Ugh, I want to call that guy and call him names right now.

Kmart Floor Associate- Let me be clear that this was one of my favorite jobs ever. I worked here during high school, and I loved it. My favorite part? Um, duh….

Yeah, I got to announce to an entire store that socks and panties were just ten cents each. I loved talking on that intercom. Truth is, if I have a cocktail or two, you can convince me to do this on pretty much any microphone anywhere.

I never should have admitted that.

Now, pray tell–what awesome jobs have you worked? Would they make a good story?

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

I want to tell you guys about one of my favorite YA books, Oh. My. Gods. By Tera Lynn Childs. This book is funny, super cute and all about the romance.

The thing about this book is, I didn’t even know it existed. No one recommended it to me, I’d never heard of the author… I just happened to be in my favorite half price book store and this cover caught my eye. I picked it up, shrugged and thought, “Huh, this looks like the kind of book I might like to read.” That’s it… I didn’t read the book jacket or check to see if there was a blurb from another author. I just took it home and fell head over heels in cyber-stalking love with not only the characters, but the author herself.

It’s one of those stories that I snuggled into my comfy chair with, and pretty much didn’t get up until I’d finished it. That’s saying something about the awesomeness of a story considering I have a four year old who needs me to get up and get her like everything in the whole world.

There’s a sequel, too–and you will definitely have to read that as well…

Now, if I can just convince the author to come out with a third in the series.

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

Okay, for starters. I love the word gross. I appreciate how it’s just one of those words that sounds like what it means.

Gross. It rolls around in your mouth almost like you’re gonna yak right there.

Love it.

Earlier today, we were running errands and my four year old ended up scoring us some free lollipops with her cuteness.* So, I was standing in the parking lot talking to a friend while we were both eating our suckers and it dawned on me: Lollipops are straight up the most germ infested, funky candy ever.

Seriously. We stick those things in our mouth, and then we pull them out. They’re all covered in our spit and whatever else is in the mouth. (I can only assume it’s those tiny bugs on my artist’s rendering above.)  At one point, I actually caught myself enunciating my point with my cherry sucker. How nasty is that?

Why are we eating these things? Why are we handing them to our little children. Have you ever seen what a kid does witha  lollipop? One time I caught my daughter sharing hers with my Pomeranian.

The thing is, I kinda like em.

*If you don’t have a cute 4 year old, I highly suggest getting one because they score free stuff like there’s no tomorrow.

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

I know what you’re thinking here…

It’s the chicken/egg thing–right?

Nope. I don’t actually care which came first. I don’t really like eggs all that much, although I do think they’re a cool shape.

What I do want to know is this:

Are you a Ninja or a Pirate?

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

I’m watching the super hot snowboarders women’s ski race today when a McDonald’s commercial comes on. They’re an official partner of the Olympic games, and that’s no big surprise because they’ve pretty much been involved with the games as long as I can remember. Then their slogan comes across the screen:

McDonalds. Eat Like An Olympian.

Um, what? Apparently, if I go to McDonald’s get some of their limited edition dipping sauce for my McNuggets, then it’s like I’m training for the Olympic Gold. Okay, I’m a grown woman and I know that is a bunch of bull, but my four year old looked up at me and said, “Mom, you’re wrong about nuggets not being healthy! If those sports people eat them, then they must be good for you!”

Yeah, McDonalds seriously undid all the work I’ve done to try to convince her that we don’t have to have every Happy Meal toy ever made.

What’s a mom supposed to do with these commercials, and why the hell is McDonalds getting away with this? I’m glad they’re sponsoring the olympics or whatever, but I could do without them trying to convince my child that if she eats a McRib, then she’s Kerri freakin’ Strug.

Screw you Ronald.

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.

So, I blame a lot of stuff I do every day on the fact that I write for teens. I figure it’s time to come clean. Truthfully, I love all this stuff.

1. Online Gaming – I love playing games with friends. So much so, that my new character has a bit of an online gaming internet addiction. So I like to blame the fact that I spent most of last night perfecting my drum solo in a Beatle’s song on the fact that I really need to BE this character and understand where she’s coming from.
2. Talking Like a Teenager - I’m for serious peeps. Occasionally, I’ll catch my self saying (out loud) O-M-G or W-T-F, and that’s really just the tip of the iceberg. So if you cool cats want to get jazzy tonight, I’ll hot dog it on over to the speakeasy and we can 23-skidoo!
3. Pink Hair, Blue Nails, and Whatever the else crap I want to wear – Okay, so when you get all grown up you’re supposed to stop dressing like you’re fifteen, but I was way too big of a wimp at fifteen to dress the way I wanted, so instead I just do it now.
4. Being Plugged In All The Time – I love being on the internet. Browsing Reddit all day, checking out the latest fads on the GeekSugar, Twittering, Reading Blogs, Watching Live Stream Videos… it’s all so fun. But, who the heck has time for all that stuff unless it’s part of their JOB to check it out. Well, I have to keep up with the trends, don’t I?
5. Reading piles and piles of YA Books – You have no idea just how cool it is to buy up like very book in the whole store and then attribute it all to research. It’s amazing.

Have a Nice Day and Watch out for the Big Yellow Chicken.