Is It Worth It To Be Negative?
I read a lot of blogs. Writing blogs, mommy blogs, decorating blogs, cooking blogs, and even gaming blogs.
They all have something in common though, they’re interesting.
Why are they interesting?
Well, some of them tell me things I didn’t know before, some of them are funny, and some of them just put me in a better mood.
Do you see what kind of blog is missing from there? The negative ones.
Now, I am not talking about the witty, sarcastic blogs that take the everyday and give us a different, hilarious perspective on the normal. Those blogs rock.
I’m talking about the whining blogs. More often than not they’re some mom down on life, hating the stay-at-home gig, complaining about her kids, her husband, or her latest anti-depressant medication.
What the hell is up with these blogs? Why do they exist, and how on earth do they have an audience.
Look, I’m not saying I’ve never been in a bad mood. Heck, I had a horrible week last week, and you didn’t see me taking it out here on my blog. (Now, I may have taken it out on a friend’s blog–but that was probably a mistake.) What I am saying is, why on earth would you want to air out your dirty laundry all over the internet for everyone to see? Why not keep that in a private journal you keep in the drawer of your night stand? (Or, if you prefer to type over hand write, then maybe a password protected blog.)
Those blogs never stay in my reader for long, and I almost never click through to comment.
How do they find an audience, and how do people write in them day in and out without letting all the sadness of the blog wear off on them? Aren’t those people worrying about losing their jobs are screwing up their families with blogs like that?
Whew. I haven’t stumbled on any of those blogs yet. I don’t know why anyone would want to post that for everyone to see.
Jamie, Jamie . . . Are you complaining about complainers? Whining about whiners?
Hmmmmmmm.
@Angela Felsted, HAHA you are the ONLY one who noticed this, and I’ve been thinking about it ALL day since I posted this!
Amen, sistah! Preach the good word.
I’ve stumbled upon several writer blogs like this, and let me tell you…I stumble away quickly.
You know who else does that? Agents. Editors. Anyone who reads the whining and thinks, “I don’t want to work with someone so negative.”
Can’t say I blame them.
Tawna
@Tawna Fenske, haha yup… that’s the first thing my agent said–don’t be negative on your blog!
Misery loves company.
You are SO right. And why should use my blog to whine? That’s what the CONE OF IHOP is for, right? 😉
Thank goodness for positive friends, or we’d never make it.
@@jmartinlibrary, holy cannoli, I SO agree… what on earth would I do without them?!?!?
I guess they have an audience because they find people who feel the same way, and by communicating their woes and worries with these other people, they feel like they’re not alone? Sometime women just need to know that there are other out there that are experiencing the same things, so that they don’t feel so crazy.
@Jessica, You know, you guys have brought up a really interesting point with that… as long as it helps them, then it’s okay, because it’s their choice to use THEIR OWN blog for whatever they want to!
Thank you for saying what I’ve been thinking!!!
It sucks that people waste so much energy on hating, whether it’s themselves or others. But hey, like you said, those people don’t stay on my reader for long 😉
@Amparo Ortiz, I am with you there… Maybe if they turned it into a positive thing, they’d be more positive in real life–then better things would happen to them…
Isn’t that like karma or chi or something? 😛
That’s like sayin, “Why do shoe strings exist?” or “Why is the sky blue?” or “Why do I get Slurpee headaches?”
It just *is*.
Up with positivity and watch out for me!!!!
@Big Yellow Chicken, mmmmm slurpee.
This is so true!
I admit, I did this once upon a time. In my early twenties. Everything I ever wrote back then is now privatized.
Personally, I can’t handle the negativity anymore. I have better things to do with my time.
@Moira Young, I wonder what my blog would have looked like in my early twenties…
Darn, I wish I’d been keeping one!
I am so with you on this, Jamie. I’ve unfollowed people on Twitter for this same reason. Everyone has bad days, but I don’t want to read about someone’s bad day over and over and over…
@Damien Walters Grintalis, yes! TOTALLY. When I look at my twitter stream, I want to see happy stuff–I don’t mind when someone gets frazzled or whatever, but when they just use their twitter account to complain, why on earth would i want that bringing me down?
I’m with you, I like fun witty posts that I can relate to. I like to do my fair share of venting…but I do try to be funny. I save the whining for my three year old! Great post!
@Renae Mercado, that’s how I feel, too… I am TOTALLY cool with the venting–as long as they do it with jokes. 🙂
Amen, sister, amen. However, I’m wondering if maybe some of those people maybe don’t have anyone to talk with? For instance… when I’m frustrated or grumpy about something I talk it over with my hubby or my sister or my best friend. I try not to vent to strangers. But I’m lucky to have those 3 wonderful people in my life… maybe others are not so lucky? So they think their blog is a way to connect? (Good lord… like my dissertation on the matter?!!) =D
@Valerie Geary, I think that’s a really great point. Maybe it’s better for them to let it all out to the world and be shiny stars at home–maybe the blogging world is saving them from being all crazy! I love that idea…
And then there are the PEOPLE that are like that every day, and not just on their blogs! I’ve cut a few people out of my daily life because they were just so negative that they were impacting my mood. As soon as they were gone, I felt so much lighter! I literally woke up in the morning and thought, “Oh my goodness, I don’t have to deal with that dark cloud today! Hooray!” You guys are right: there are so many great blogs out there and it’s a shame to waste time on the downers. I can barely stay up-to-date on the happy ones!
@Mercedes, oh how true that is! I am the same way, I have so much trouble keeping up with friends–why keep up with people that don’t actually make me happy!?
Hmm, I think even with all the crap I have went through for the last year that I still remain positive. Even when I talk about having my insides turned inside out I still try to be happy. Life is tooooo short to be sad all the time. I get upset when I read women trashing their husbands. I would never ever do that. I don’t get it.
You take the good,
You take the bad,
You take them both and there you have the facts of life.
The facts of life.
@Not So Average Mama,
man oh man that was an AWESOME show haha!
I’m with you! I’ve had my bad days where I whined a bit in a post but I try to be positive and interesting, mostly because I hate reading downer posts. There are too many fabulous blogs out there to waste time on negative ones (except the snarky ones. I kinda like snarky–as long as it doesn’t cross the line into mean. Mean sucks.).
Have a great day! 🙂
@Mary, yeah, I think the occasional whine is TOTALLY okay. It’s those EVERY day whines that are killer, yanno?